I think I almost died… The first thing the hospital should do when they kick you out is give you a laxative. Then this could have all been avoided. After 4 days of eating lots of fiber (like they told me) and drinking tons of fluids, I still hadn’t had a “movement”. Got hubby to pick me up a suppository as I was starting to feel really bloated and uncomfortable last night and the fiber pills didn’t seem to be doing much.
He brought home the #1 selling brand. “For gentle, predictable fast relief of occasional constipation.” Just what I wanted. Was all ready to get things moving so I shoved it up there and waited a few minutes. I figured I should head towards the bathroom (since it’s such a long trek and I wasn’t sure how quickly things would get started). Got there and then thought it might be a good idea to have my phone, you know, in case I got bored, ha! So I hobbled back to the bedroom to grab it.
By the time I made it back to the throne room, a hot wave had begun to spread across my body. Good Lord, God Almighty, then the spasms started. I broke out in a cold sweat, and my head started spinning. I was losing it. Consciousness started slipping away and the only thing I could think of is don’t take a header off the toilet and break your implant! I was grasping to the hand rails for dear life. Wave after wave hit me as 5 days of fiber finally started to make its way through my system.
I wasn’t sure how much longer I would be able to stay upright so I grabbed for my phone and texted my daughter to come to my rescue. Then since she’s not always quick to answer texts from me, I called her too and just kept saying, please come help me in the bathroom. She came and I somehow managed to relay that I needed her to gather blankets and pillows. My vision was fading, I wasn’t sure I could hold on much longer. She brought them back and laid out a spot on the floor for me where I promptly collapsed on to them, only to drag myself up moments later for the next spasm. I am not lying, I saw my life flash before my eyes. After an hour of floor-to-throne moments, I think I made it through the worst of it. Now I get to deal with the residual “ring of fire” yay. Stupid hospital! But hey, at least I can laugh about it now!
Aside from my near death experience, today has been a much better day! Last night I managed a stretch of 2 hours sleep instead of the usual 45min – 1hr. What a difference that makes. The pain is also far more tolerable today. This could be due to switching to Tylenol with Codene, but I’m seriously hoping it’s just the natural healing progression and I’ll be off the pain meds completely very soon. The transition between the two pain drugs was not a pleasant experience though, so I’m very glad that’s behind me.
The hair that was shaved around my ear is growing back rapidly and I’m finding my head incredibly itchy now. Partly the new hair growth, partly the bandage, and partly the healing, I’m sure. I just have to keep myself distracted or I may find myself scratching my ear right off. Still having a bit of dizziness when I’m up walking around so I try to push myself a little bit more. I know sitting on my butt for a week won’t help me get back to my usual self.
Now that things are moving the way they are supposed to and I am feeling a bit more energetic, I keep reminding myself that this is all very temporary. The recovery stage will soon be behind me and I’ll be hearing once again. This is what I eagerly await. 23 days & counting…